A Break From Your Regularly Scheduled Reading

I feel the need to break from the norm of shiny happy posts about the pregnancy and baby, and be real about what's going on underneath the surface of what seems like a blissfully perfect life. Life is still good, just complicated. I don't know why I didn't post about it before. I guess I was trying to sugarcoat a bad situation, so I just glossed over it as if it never happened. And then things went back to normal, so I just didn't feel the need to dredge it up and put it out there in the blogisphere.

But- Right after the new year, Gregg was basically forced out of his position as Technical Director at King Street Church. It's a long story that doesn't necessitate all the details being rehashed at this point, but suffice it to say that we both felt pretty betrayed by what happened. We stopped attending church there, and Gregg quickly found another job elsewhere with a small marketing company. We've been looking for a church to go to since the middle of January. With Chambersburg located in, essentially, the Bible belt of the Mid-Atlantic, we thought we'd have very little trouble finding a new church home. We were wrong.

Every Sunday, we ventured out to try almost every different type of congregation imaginable. But something wasn't clicking. It was either too liberal, or too conservative, or too... something. I thought maybe at one point we were just being too picky! With a baby coming, we know we want to be connected to a church family and find spiritual encouragement. It seems like the more we look, the more discouraged we become. I feel lost, like we had been a part of something and then were kicked out. We had after all, moved from Florida just for Gregg's job at King Street. We don't even really like the town of Chambersburg, nor the surrounding area.

But it's our home, sort of. The whole church search and everything makes me wonder sometimes why we came here. And if we could have avoided uprooting the life we had down in FL. So many questions that are unanswered. We seemed to be heading in one direction, then got thrown off the track. I really want to get back on track again, and create some sort of stability for the family we're growing. If it at all felt like home to us once, it certainly doesn't anymore.

Good and Bad

So a few weeks ago, Gregg and I bought a mini-van. We got one because 1) our family is growing, and 2) it was really about time we had a second vehicle. We got a great deal on a pre-owned van, which was in almost pristine condition. It drives well and has a good bit of room inside. After owning it for almost two weeks, an illegal immigrant driving a borrowed vehicle lost control of his car and slammed into the front left end of the minivan while it was parked at Gregg's workplace. The man who was in the country illegally was arrested by the policeman who arrived on the scene and most likely deported. Leaving us to deal with the insurance company of the guy who let this idiot drive his car.

Right off the bat, we could tell this would not be a smooth process. Gregg filed a claim and the insurance people weren't playing very nice. They did eventually have someone come out to appraise the damage on the van and determined it's a total loss. They're claiming no liability because they only insure the owner of the car that hit us, not the driver. Which is a bunch of crapola. So we're filing a lawsuit against the owner to recoup the value of our van.

This whole thing bothers me on so many levels. First, the injustice of it all. The fact that this insurance company is being shady and not paying up. The fact that we spent hard earned money on a car and did not do a single thing to cause this accident in any way, shape, or form, but some fool comes along and in one second, destroys a possession of ours. Second, the sheer frustration of having to deal with something like this. Third, sadness that we have to actually sue somebody in order to get our money back. The whole filing a lawsuit thing really creeps me out. But what other choice do we have? Hopefully, it will just be settled out of court and we won't have to appear on Judge Judy (ha ha).

I've been hesitant to blog about this because I don't want to seem complainy. There are plenty of very good things happening in our lives right now. Nobody got injured. Nobody died. We have suffered a material loss and setback, but there are worse things in life. I remember reading an article last year in a Christian magazine that said our life is like a railroad track, and at all times there are good things happening and bad things happening. There are no mountaintops or valleys. As I look back on my life, I find this to be true. Especially now. We have been blessed with a wonderful little miracle we are so looking forward to. That's obviously the good part. On the other hand, we are experiencing unfairness and a big irritation. That's the bad part. I shouldn't be caught off guard when negative things happen to me. But I am. Jesus said, "in this life you will have trouble." He guaranteed it. He did not want us to be surprised when "bad things happen to good people".

I guess what I'm trying to say in all of this, is that I need to give it over to God and leave it in His hands. He is still in control. And like I said before, there are worse things in life.

So on to more pleasant things... we had a very nice Valentines Day. Well, evening really. We were invited out to dinner at Red Robin by our friends Dave & Theresa. I was so glad that after a long and somewhat frustrating day at work, I got to spend time with my husband and good friends eating good food and enjoying great conversation. You know you have good friends when you leave their presence feeling reenergized and blessed. On Friday, I met my friend Ruthann and her 21 month old daughter Calleigh for lunch. We talked about pregnancy and our husbands (all good stuff!) over sandwiches and ice cream. Then I got to go home because I didn't have to be back at work. That night, Gregg and I went over to Ryan & Anita's and played Scattergories and watched a movie. Saturday we pretty much enjoyed the day off together, running some errands and getting some great bargains out shopping. I picked up a baby names book for $3 which I spent a few hours last night going through and highlighting.

On the pregnancy front, I am officially getting too big for my own pants. I'm not sure if it's all the bloating, or if it's truly my tummy poking out there. I haven't been sleeping as well, either. The last few nights, I've woken up in the middle of the night feeling like I'm going to crawl out of my skin. Like when you have too much caffeine. Only I've been avoiding caffeinated substances. My digestive system is still screwed up because of all the hormones that are raging. The hormones are also making me way more irritable and sensitive. Oh yeah, I have now entered my second trimester! 1 down, two to go. They say the second one is the easiest. The nausea has let up and you're not running to the bathroom constantly anymore. My risk of miscarrying has decreased signficantly. I can't believe I'm in my fourth month already. Only 27 more weeks to go!