Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Random Thoughts

All quiet in the Boonstra household... for now. I thought I'd take this opportunity while Colton is napping in his swing to post something. It's amazing how much he consumes my life. Not in a bad way, of course. Just that a lot of my time is devoted to making sure he has what he needs and is happy.

Being a mom sure changes everything. That worried feeling I used to tease my own mother about, I now have. I have pretty much second guessed every decision I've made since he was born, and when he's settled down after fussing or crying and I go do something else, I feel guilty that I'm not spending that time with him. This anxiety has driven me to read all I can get my hands on about how to raise children. It's definitely helped me not to feel so overwhelmed and unprepared.

The washer, dryer, and dishwasher seem to be going nonstop with all the laundry and bottles Colton goes through in a day. I'm going through more clothes myself. I don't think there's a day that I haven't been spit up on! I've managed to avoid getting peed on when I'm changing a diaper by placing a washcloth over the "sprinkler". Still, there are times when I'm holding him that all of a sudden I'll start to feel a warm sensation and then need to go change my pants. Those diapers don't hold as much as you think.

I think I'm going to start reliving my own childhood over again now that I have a kid. I started recalling many of the songs I listened to as a child, and began singing them to Colton. My sister and I would listen ad nauseum in our playroom to our Sesame Street records. Decades later, I can still remember a lot of those simple but fun lyrics. I was thinking about going online and seeing if I can get some of the records on cd now.

So this is my last week of maternity leave. I go back to work on Monday. Boo hiss. My supervisor has been really great though about making sure my transition back is as non-stressful as possible. We talked about reducing my caseload to about 4 or 5 "low maintenance" kids and taking on some adoption work to make up the rest of my pay. This would allow me to spend more time at home with Colton. It seems like my agency is really doing whatever they can to keep me, and they understand how difficult it is to return now that I have a small baby.

In other news, Gregg and I ventured out this past Sunday to try yet another church. It was okay. Not great, not bad. The congregation was pretty small but very welcoming. I can't say I instantly felt like this was the church for us, but we'll probably go back. We received a card in the mail yesterday from the pastor thanking us for attending, which was nice.

I'd better go, I hear a baby crying...

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