Five Weeks

Today I went out for the first time on my own with Colton, and met my friend Ruthann for lunch at Panera. It was so nice to get out of the house! It felt a little weird to drive again, though. Our first outing alone together was a success. Colton slept in the minivan on the way there and on the way back, and he fussed a little when we got to the restaurant but I gave him a pacifier and he settled right down. It was great to have some quality girltalk. It is so good to have a friend that "gets me".

I can't believe Colton is five weeks old already! He's sleeping longer during the night, which his mommy sure appreciates. Last night he slept from 8pm to 1am and woke up again at 5. He is taking 4 oz. about 7-8 times a day now. The other day, he smiled at me for the first time and my heart melted.

Sometimes I am just overwhelmed with how much I love this little boy. The feeling wasn't instaneous for me though, as I thought it would be. It grew on me over these last few weeks.

So many women talk about the birth of their child in glowing terms and how they just fell in love with their baby right away. They almost make it seem glamorous. There certainly wasn't anything glamorous in my case about being cut open and then left incapacitated in an uncomfortable hospital bed, in the worst pain I've ever been in. With all that I went through to bring my son into the world, I can't say it was love at first sight. But I definitely love him now with a love I didn't know before.

I daydream about what he will be like in all the different stages of childhood. I know he'll grow up fast right before my eyes, but he will always be my little boy.

How cute is he???

Tess and Colton, the best of friends