Summertime and the Livin' is Busy

I'm finally getting around to posting after almost two months. To say this summer has been busy would be an understatement. We moved into our house at the end of June. It is so much bigger than our condo and we're only paying $100 more in rent. I love that Colton has a playroom and a backyard to run around in. We unpacked and settled in pretty quickly. There's definitely more to clean, but I'm enjoying the extra space!

I've also been busier than usual with MOMS Club since being elected Vice President at the beginning of July. I'm responsible for coordinating service projects and finding speakers for our monthly meetings, as well as attending the board meeting once a month. It is incredibly rewarding and we have a wonderful executive board this year who has a lot of great ideas and focus.

Of course, I'm just busy daily taking care of a soon-to-be three year old and growing his baby sister inside of me. I'm now 31 weeks pregnant and feel like "Large Marge". I get pain in my lower back, hips, legs, and feet frequently. I'm also feeling Braxton Hicks at least once a day, usually in the evening. Baby Girl is moving around almost all the time, mostly at night when I'm lying in bed. It sometimes feels like she's trying to kick or punch her way out. I've started going to the doctor every two weeks and will until my 36th week, when I begin going every week until my due date.

The nursery is starting to fill up with stuff. Two Saturdays ago, my mom and sister threw a "sprinkle" for me and I ended up with a ton of super cute girl clothes. She is going to be one well dressed baby! The crib and dresser are being ordered at the end of this month, courtesy of both sets of grandparents. I'm excited for her arrival, yet also apprehensive about the changes that will take place in our family. I wonder how in the world I'm going to take care of two children. It seems like one is hard enough.

I know I'm not going to go through this alone, however. I have plenty of support from my friends in the MOMS Club, several of whom just recently had their second child. My sister is also pregnant and due in January so our babies will be two or three months apart (depending on whether she delivers early again)! It will be really awesome if she also has a girl.

Colton turns three on Sunday, and we're having about 50 people here tomorrow for his birthday party. After cleaning the house and filling goody bags for 18 children, I am exhausted. I'm looking forward to it though. Colton is excited to have his friends over to "have cake and sing the cake song (Happy Birthday to You)". I can't believe my little boy is going to be three! It feels like just yesterday that he was a tiny newborn. Now he's speaking in paragraphs and using the big people potty. I don't know where the time went…

Back From Vacation

I figured that since I actually have some spare time in between vacation and moving, I would write a quick post. We are back from Sesame Place and had a GREAT time. Colton loved going on all the rides (even a roller coaster that I thought he would be scared of) and meeting the Sesame characters, especially Elmo! The look on his face when he saw Elmo for the first time is one I will remember for the rest of my life. He was so happy to give Elmo a hug and a high five, then take him by the hand to try to take a walk.

Due to my condition (a.k.a. pregnancy), the only rides I could go on were the carousel and Big Bird's Lazy River where I just sat in a giant tube and floated down the water, but it was still fun seeing Colton have a blast and experience everything through his child's eyes. I remember Sesame Place being a lot bigger, but that was more than 20 years ago. We had pretty good weather while we were there also- not too hot or too cool- and because we went before school lets out, it wasn't that crowded. It rained for a little bit on our third day, so we decided to drive out to the Crayola Factory and spend a few hours there. Our last day was finally hot enough to enjoy the water rides, and Colton couldn't wait to splash around in the toddler sized tidal pool area.

We left on Wednesday and as soon as we pulled onto the highway, Colton fell asleep. Naps were not a regular occurrence during our trip, but he did fairly well anyway. We tried to head off a meltdown on our second day, which was our longest day in the park, by leaving after lunch and going for a drive. Colton ended up sleeping for about an hour, and then we went back.

Because we had season passes, we could come and go whenever we felt like it. We also didn't pay for parking since we upgraded them. The passes also gave us a 30% discount on food and merchandise. The really nice thing is that we can go back at another time for just a day, if we want, up until October 30.

On Thursday, we slept in and ran some errands during the afternoon. We stopped for lunch at Panera Bread, which turned out to be ill fated. Gregg and I both ended up with food poisoning. He had it worse than I did, which I only attribute to the fact that I'm pregnant and am currently not (ahem!) regular. Thank goodness Colton didn't also get sick, but it wiped the two of us out for the following day. My throat and chest still hurt from all the vomiting. I was worried about it affecting the baby, so I tried to stay as hydrated as possible even though I couldn't keep food down. She seems to be doing fine though, kicking the tar out of me when she's awake.

In other news, we decided on a name for Baby Girl! We're not revealing it until she's born, like we did with Colton. I am surprised that we were able to choose a name at 23 weeks when we couldn't decide on Colton's until 38. I go for my 24 week appointment next Friday, and then shortly after that I'll be in my third trimester already. I can't believe she'll be here in less than four months. :)

Everything but the White Picket Fence

I was thinking recently about the fact that I am right where I want to be at this stage of life. In my early 30s, with a great husband I've been with for almost a decade, and a mother to a beautiful little boy and a baby girl on the way. I have supportive friends, a great church, and live in a nice community. Things haven't always been easy during these past several years, and there have certainly been a lot of twists and turns along the way, but the pieces have pretty much fallen into place.

And I don't deserve any of it. I am blessed, to say the least. After we found out we were having a daughter, I thought that the only thing missing from our lives was a house. We've been looking to move out of our condo since the beginning of March. It has been wonderful living here, but as I mentioned in a previous post, since our family is growing, we need more space. For a few months, it seemed that every place we looked at was either out of our budget, too outdated, or in an undesirable location. I know that it's somewhat slim pickings around here, because we're renting instead of buying, but I was beginning to get discouraged.

Last Monday we went to look at a rental property advertised on Craiglist that's located in the next town over. After seeing it, I knew it was the place for us. 3 bedrooms, 1.5 baths, a full finished basement with an office, updated interior, newer appliances, and a nice yard in a kid friendly neighborhood. It was a little out of our price range, so Gregg emailed the people renting it out to ask if they could possibly lower the rent some. They wrote back saying they would be able to, that they had other applications in for the full amount but thought we were a great fit for the place. So after criminal and credit checks were done, we were offered the house yesterday! We are stopping by tomorrow night to sign the lease and put down the security deposit.

I am really looking forward to living in a house again. No neighbors upstairs or in adjoining units, making all kinds of noise which freaks the dog out. I can just let Tess outside in the backyard to do her business, instead of walking her in bad or cold weather. Colton can play in the yard, splashing in his water table or riding one of his toy vehicles around. The previous tenants actually left behind a swing set and an outdoor playhouse, too. He'll also have a designated play room where we can stash most of his toys, instead of them crowding his bedroom or taking over the living room.

I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed, faced with the task of packing while being 6 months pregnant and taking care of a 2 1/2 year old! I just want to hire somebody to do it for me. I know that we're only moving 10 minutes away, instead of out-of-state like we've done before, so it shouldn't be that bad. And we are going to hire movers, instead of enlisting the help of family and friends. I just hate packing. And then unpacking. Blech. In the middle of all this, we also leave for vacation next week! We are going to Sesame Place in Langhorne, PA for a few days. We haven't had a real vacation in seven years. I really think Colton is going to love it, since it's geared for small kids and has all of his favorite characters.

That's it for now. I'm not sure how much updating I'll be doing these next few weeks... it's going to be a very busy June!

Sugar and Spice

I had my 20 week ultrasound yesterday morning, and found out that we're having a girl!!! I really didn't have a strong feeling towards either gender this time. When I was pregnant with Colton, I would have bet money that I was having a boy. I really couldn't guess with this pregnancy. The ultrasound tech asked if we wanted to know the baby's gender, and since I said yes, she told us that she couldn't find anything indicating it was a boy so it was most likely a girl! Tears started welling up in my eyes.

It felt really good to ask how big "she" was measuring- 12 ounces and two days ahead of my due date (Gregg's birthday!) Everything else with the exam went perfectly. Baby Girl kept moving around so much that it was hard for the tech to get all the measurements she needed, especially for the heart. We got several pictures to take home with us, but they didn't do any 3D ones, which I was disappointed about. Oh well, I'll get to see my daughter in person just five months from now.

My daughter. I get tears in my eyes again just thinking it. I really, really wanted a girl but I knew I was going to be okay if I ended up having two boys. I feel like our family is complete now. I was pretty sure I only wanted two kids, and now I'm definitely sure that we're done. I feel incredibly blessed to have been given two healthy children and for the privilege of raising both a son and a daughter.

Of course, after the appointment I got on the phone right away to call and text family and friends. My mother started getting choked up when I told her she was having a granddaughter. She can't wait to go out and buy pink clothes! Speaking of which, we need a lot of since nearly all of Colton's outfits are either blue or plastered with puppies, sports or cars. My friend Laura has two girls and offered to let me have their clothing before she tries to sell it in a garage sale. All of the gear we registered for when I was preggo with Colton is non-gender specific, so we can reuse all of that.

I am very excited that we're having a little girl. Gregg and I are actually agreeing on names this time! We couldn't settle on a name for Coltie until the week before he was born. I'm thinking pink and brown for the nursery too. Now all we need is to find a house to rent in the next couple of months!

Almost Halfway...

... through this pregnancy, that is. I can't believe I'm well into my 18th week when it seems like just yesterday those two pink lines appeared on a stick. I've been feeling the baby move around consistently for about two weeks now, feeling him or her more when I sit down for a while, particularly when I'm leaning foward. My big ultrasound is scheduled for May 24, and I cannot wait! Hopefully baby #2 will cooperate and we'll find out if Colton is going to have a little brother or a little sister. So far on Gregg's side of the family, there is an even number of boys and girls. All the grandchildren have also been born in perfect girl/boy order, so according to this "trend" the next one should be a girl! Either way, this baby will be the tie breaker.

In other news, I've been really frustrated lately with Colton's behavior. I'm struggling with how to respond to him in the best way, without completely losing my temper. Every request is met with a no, and he is constantly testing his limits. Sometimes I think he's being obstinate just for the heck of it, trying to be as independent as he can be. He'll refuse to get a new diaper put on, eat his food, get dressed, etc. The tantrums have also risen to a new level. Over everything. Over nothing. When we have to leave some place to come home or when I don't let him do or have something he wants, it is mass hysteria.

We're also potty training which is driving me nuts. Colton started to express an interest in going on the potty a few weeks ago. So I went with it, not wanting to discourage him and perhaps miss a golden opportunity. Whenever I take his diaper off, he proclaims he wants to "go pee pee on the potty". He can tell me when he's wet and is dirty, needs privacy to poop, knows the body parts that the pee and poop come out of and calls them by their proper names, and can even undress himself with a little bit of help. He is also more than happy to flush the toilet for me. But there's nothing actually happening while he sits on the potty. Nada, zero, zilch.

I try to have him sit there no more than 3 to 5 minutes, because any longer and it becomes a way for him to stall something. I've tried letting him run around the house naked, so that I might "catch him in the act" and be able to redirect him to the potty but when I wasn't paying attention he peed on the carpet in his room. He did come and find me right away to tell me he had "made a mess" though, which I praised him for and then reminded him that pee pee goes in the potty. I've tried to strenghten the connection between "going" and the potty by emptying the contents of his poopy diapers into the big toilet and letting him flush them. I'll sit on the toilet while he sits on his potty and we'll talk about how it feels to know when the pee pee is coming. I've even done live demonstrations and talked about everything as it's happening! Now I really just want to let him pick out his own underwear, and maybe if he's uncomfortable being wet in them he'll ask to go on the potty when he actually has to go, not just when his diaper is taken off. I don't know. I know this process can take a frustrating amount of time, but I'm at a loss. Any dreams of Colton being trained, at least during the day, by the time the new baby comes are fading quickly. Sigh.

It can be easy to focus on the bad even while there is so much good. It's easy to forget how beautiful and wonderful this child is when I'm exasperated by another meltdown or the fact that he won't listen. But he is. I continue to be amazed by him. Not that long ago, Colton could barely string two words together and now he's talking in complete sentences. Making up jokes. Recounting the day's events to his daddy at night before bed. Saying please and thank you without being prompted. Suddenly pronouncing several words correctly that he could not before. He knows many of his colors, though he still gets red mixed up with pink and yellow with orange. He can also identify several letters and knows all of his animal sounds. He also likes to sing along to his Toddler Tunes cd, which he must play every morning while he's getting ready and every night before bedtime.

I know this challenging phase will pass eventually. I need to treasure the time I have with Colton while he's so young. One day when he's a teenager and "too cool" for his mom, I'll be longing for the days when he felt comfortable enough with me to throw an epic tantrum.

The Storm Has Passed

Whew. That was one of the most trying weeks I've had as a parent so far. A close second would be when Colton was cutting his first year molars last March and I got a total of ten hours of sleep. Yep, and I wanted another child.

After sticking to the B.R.A.T. diet (much to Colton's dismay since I wouldn't let him have his beloved milk) my little boy finally showed signs of returning to normal by Wednesday night. I've never been so happy NOT to see a poopy diaper. And then, I got sick. I still don't know if it was a very mild case of Colton's bug, or pregnancy induced nausea, but suddenly I couldn't stand to smell, eat, or look at food. I was pretty useless over Thursday and Friday, but by that time Gregg had returned home from his business trip and was able to help me out.

Now that the plague of sickness has passed by our house, I feel like I'm able to focus on and enjoy this pregnancy. I am 15 weeks along today, and have been in maternity clothes now for two. It's pretty obvious already to everyone that I'm having a baby. With my first pregnancy, I almost felt like an impostor at 16 weeks going to Babies 'R Us to register because I was barely showing. Call me crazy, but I think I felt a kick yesterday too. Things are happening so much quicker this time around!

I heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time at my 12 week appointment on April 1. It was strong and in the 170's! People keep telling me that, based on the heart rate, I'm having a girl. I know it's just an old wives tale, but it's fun to believe. I still really want a daughter. We should find out sometime in May!

I'm starting to look at new furniture for the nursery, along with double strollers (yikes). I am also beginning to gather some information on breastfeeding, so I'll be more prepared this time. I haven't made the solid decision yet whether I want to try it again, but I feel okay either way. Colton flourished on formula and has been a pretty healthy kid, so I'm not worried. I think, though, that I have decided I'd like to try a VBAC if I go into labor on my own. That's all up to my body and baby's timing, which I understand. No matter how this child is delivered and fed, the most important thing of all to me is that he or she is healthy at birth and that I do not experience PPD again. I am honestly not overly concerned about it coming back, because I think a lot of the pressures and lack of knowledge I felt as a first time mom just won't be there. But I don't want to be naive, either. I want to be able to recognize the signs and ask for help when I need it, instead of suffering silently.

Since we learned baby #2 was on the way, we have also been planning to move from the condo into a house. Right now we only have two bedrooms and absolutely no yard. We haven't found anything great in our price range yet, but our landlord is in no hurry to see us leave since he still has a mortgage on this place and the market is flooded with rentals right now. He actually offered to reduce our rent if we stayed longer.

While looking for another place to live, Gregg and I actually had a discussion (more like an argument) about moving back to Florida. This past winter was horrible, and things aren't getting any cheaper. It might actually make sense if we didn't have a kid and one on the way. But reality is, Gregg has a very good job up here and we have an invaluable support system. Last summer and fall when we were facing the possibility of Gregg losing his job or being transferred due to the buyout, I had a lot of peace that we were supposed to stay here. That, in fact, God was not calling us to leave New Jersey and would move all the pieces into place so that we could continue living here. And He did just that. So in seeking Him again for whether a relocation was in the plan this time, I clearly heard that the answer was no. God has many more opportunities for us to minister and be ministered to here. Gregg also (though more reluctantly) felt the same answer.

Though I hate feeling at odds with my husband, this was a chance for us to really confront and pray through an issue that has been lurking in our marriage. I know that Gregg has this spirit of adventure within him. John Eldredge says in his book, Wild at Heart, that "adventure is a deeply spiritual longing written into the soul of a man." It has been given to him by God and right now Gregg feels stuck in a lot of ways, particularly at work, and that he's not able to do enough because of how tight our finances still are living in one of the most expensive areas of the country. God has shown me how I can empathize with my husband, instead of judging him, and speak to him in a way that opens up communication rather than shuts it down.

Wow, that was a lot of writing. I guess I'm making up for all those months where I hardly blogged at all!

Life.

I'll admit it. I'm spent. After three and a half days taking care of a sick toddler, while my husband is away on business, and battling a cold myself being four months pregnant, I. am. done. There have been more than a few times in the past several hours that I've wanted to call my mom to come take care of me. How come THIS was never in any of the What to Expect books? Colton is finally getting over a nasty stomach virus, which started early Saturday morning.

Thankfully the puking only lasted for that one day, but the diarrhea continued through until late last night. In the middle of all this, Gregg left for a business trip and won't be home until Thursday. I called the doctor twice to ask what I should do, and was told to keep Colton hydrated and on the B.R.A.T. (bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast) diet. So he's been living on bananas, crackers, and Pedialyte for the past 72 hours. His poop has firmed up a little bit and the horrible diaper rash has gotten much better since then, thanks to Boudreaux's Butt Paste.

I almost had a breakdown last night on the phone to Gregg, who calmly reassured me that I was doing everything I could do for our son. I hate when he's sick. I hate that I can't do much about it. I hate that I've thrown myself a pity party. The past few days have really highlighted the differences between my two pregnancies. With the first one, I was blissfully dreaming about motherhood, taking belly pictures every single week, never forgetting to read about how the baby was developing or which fruit's size it had grown to that particular week. This time, I have to stop myself and ask "wait, what week is this?" I've taken a total of one photo of my growing tummy. I'm too busy trying to meet the demanding needs of a 2 1/2 year old to even remember that I'm pregnant.

I wonder how on earth I'm going to take care of a toddler and a newborn at the same time. And how I could possibly love this baby as much as I love the child I already have. I know I won't pay as much attention to all of the firsts, or take nearly as many pictures of him or her. But I also won't be coming off some ridiculously high, disillusioned concept of motherhood with this one. I won't expect to bond right away, and will know that this is perfectly okay. I'll be more relaxed about the fact that he or she didn't meet a milestone within the "average" limits. I will know that while parenting can be incredibly frustrating, it can also be wonderfully rewarding simultaneously.

So while I can't quite see the end of the tunnel to Colton's present illness, I need to remember that this too shall pass. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and choose to focus instead on my blessings, which are in abundance. While my toddler has suddenly developed a case of mine-itis and continually pushes boundaries, I am happy that he is speaking in full sentences, knows most of his colors, and recognizes several letters of the alphabet. It may be just small potatoes, but at this stage it makes me one proud mama. I know he'll be a great big brother too.

Confirmation

So everything went great at my doctor's appointment last Friday. We saw our little sweet pea and his or her heart beating away! It was very reassuring. We told Colton that the baby was on "tv", and he said "baby?" and then asked for the remote!

It turns out that I'm further along than I thought. The baby was measuring at 9w2d, when the date of my LMP put me at 8w3d. I told the doctor I was pretty sure that I ovulated early in my last cycle, on day 12. But that still doesn't make up an entire week! After not getting pregnant our first month of trying, I started paying super close attention to everything once I got my period at the beginning of January. I wanted to see if there was anything I could do naturally to help the process along, and stumbled across the Billings Ovulation Method. You basically observe and record the amount & consistency of cervical mucus from the first day of your cycle to the end. By charting, you're then able to tell when your most fertile days are. I started noticing a change from a basic infertile pattern to a fertile one two days after my period ended, so I am almost positive that I did ovulate on day 12. The Billings Method is a little confusing to figure out at first (and sounds gross), but I highly recommend it. I always just assumed that I o'd midway through my cycle on day 14 or 15, and if I had stayed with that assumption, our timing would have been off. It's also useful for preventing pregnancy, too.

Anyway, the doctor did not see a need to change my due date yet. She said we would wait and see if the baby continues to measure that far ahead in the months that follow. After the ultrasound we met with her in her office to discuss delivery options. She told me that they will not induce a woman who has had a prior C-section, because of the risk of uterine rupture that violent contractions could bring on. So I'm not allowed to go past my due date, but if I go into labor on my own before then they'll let me try a VBAC. At this point, I think I've decided that I want to try a vaginal birth if it's possible. I feel so much better knowing that I actually have a choice. The C-section totally sucked, but for some reason I don't think delivering "naturally" will be all that much better either. I really don't want to tear down there. But I also don't want to go through another major abdominal surgery and be so drugged up I can barely hold my newborn child. I still have 7 more months to weigh my options.

For now I am just so glad that baby #2 is growing and developing correctly. God is good!

Expectant

I am so glad that it's finally March and almost springtime!! The weather is getting warmer already, and I'm daydreaming about taking walks outside and going to the playground with Colton. Almost all of the snow around here has melted... hopefully we won't have any last minute snow falls!

As of Valentine's Day, Colton is 2 1/2- that age every parent dreads. It's only been a few weeks, but I've already started noticing some subtle changes in his behavior. Not nearly as bad as when he turned 18 months though. That was like someone literally flipped a switch, and he went from sweet as can be to trouble maker. He is getting really particular about things, which is becoming annoying. I can't decide if it's just because he's two, or if he is really as anal retentive as his mommy! At his 30 month well visit, he weighed 28 lbs 3 0z and was 35 1/2 inches tall. Still only in the 25th percentile for both height and weight.

In other news, come this October our family is going to get just a little bit bigger. I found out that we are expecting baby #2 on Groundhog Day! The Groundhog saw a shadow; I saw two lines. I've been busting to tell the news on here, but Gregg wanted to wait until I was further along. I am excited for Colton to be a big brother, although I can't picture him as the older brother yet. To me, he's still my baby. Of course, he hasn't grasped the concept yet that there is a baby growing inside Mommy's tummy.

So far, I've felt worse during this pregnancy than I did with Colton. Nauseous, bloated, and exhausted nearly all of the time. Which leads me to believe this baby might possibly be a girl, if the saying is true. I would be lying if I said I didn't care either way. Yes, ultimately I want the baby to be healthy. But... it would be nice to be on the pink team this go-round. It would also be nice for Colton to have a little buddy though!

As of today, I am 8 weeks and 2 days pregnant and my jeans are already getting a little tight. I'm also starting to "pop" a little, which is only noticeable to me and the hubs right now. I may have to break out my maternity pants before the first trimester is even over. They say that you start showing sooner the second time around.

I go for my first ultrasound tomorrow afternoon. Gregg is taking the day off so he can go with me and Colton. I'm both excited and nervous. I have no reason to suspect anything might be wrong (all these symptoms assure me that there is a baby growing in there the way he/she should), but since Colton was born I've read a lot of horror stories. I was blissfully naiive during my first pregnancy, but now I know better. I know I am VERY blessed to have a healthy child, when there are a lot of mothers who aren't so fortunate. I will definitely be praising God all the more for another healthy child. I thank Him every night that he has given us another baby, and I'm looking forward to seeing how another son or daughter grows and develops. :)

Life Is Good!

So I thought it was time for an update... I know Christmas was ages ago (okay, only a month) but I figured I would start with that. We had a good time visiting with all of Gregg's family on Christmas Day and then mine the second weekend of January. Colton received several very LARGE and very LOUD presents that we had to rent another condo to fit them all in- just kidding! There is currently a train table taking up half of our living room, though, and his bedroom is busting with so many toys, I don't know where to put them all. I think next year I'm telling people to get him books and clothes... practical, quiet, and SMALL. I mean really, do people consider the size of our current living quarters before they purchase these gifts? Anyway, I am appreciative of our family's generosity and that this kid has want of nothing. My sister bought him his own V-tech laptop so he can sit at the table just like mom and dad, typing away and practicing his phonics.

I think it snowed 10 out of 14 days these past couple of weeks and I.am.sick.of.it. Not a big fan of winter to begin with, and this just all the more makes me want to move back down to Florida. It's not fun to be stuck in the house. :( Today, despite temperatures in the teens and low 20s, we bundled ourselves up to go to the mall and return a few Christmas gifts. After scoring some great store credit to be used in the future, we grabbed lunch and then splurged on Starbucks coffee, which Gregg & I drank while Colton played in the mall's Kid Zone. It was a nice family afternoon out that I desperately needed.

My little boy is going to be two and a half in only a few short weeks. 2 1/2! Where did the time go? I'm having (mostly) a blast watching him grow up. Colton can say about 140 words now, and his vocabulary has tripled in the past five months. The words are coming so fast these days that I hardly have time to write them down! He's also starting to put three and four words together in sentences and can identify a few letters, such as A, B, C, L, O, and P. Colton is obsessed with trains and Curious George. He asks to watch "mo-nee" every night before bed. He also LOVES to read. Well, have us read to him at least. I borrowed a Curious George book from the library last month that was 46 pages, and he sat there every day (sometimes twice a day) through the entire thing, paying close attention and pointing out pictures. I found that reading together at least once a day has really improved his vocabulary.

We broke down and bought a potty a few weeks ago, but the truth is he just isn't ready yet. And I'm okay with that. He's growing up so fast as it is. I dreaded the "terrible twos", but you know what, two is actually pretty terrific. Colton definitely has his bad days when he's cranky and nothing pleases him, but I've noticed that he seems to be much more socially and emotionally mature than most boys his age. He doesn't grab toys away from other kids, he rarely has meltdowns when he doesn't get his way, and he can adapt pretty easily to changes in routine. I joke that we shouldn't "mess with perfection" by having a second one, ha ha! But seriously, Colton is not perfect- he can be outright defiant at times, tries to run away from me in public places, and gets so worked up if the opposite parent puts him to bed that he pukes all over the place. Last Sunday I was at a baby shower, so Gregg had to put him down for a nap and Colton was anxious about me being gone so much he made himself sick. In the middle of December, Gregg needed to work late several days in a row and wasn't available to put Coltie to bed as he always does, so when I did it instead his anxiety got the best of him... and you guessed it, he blew chunks. I can't tell you how many times we've had to wash the crib bumper over the past 10 months! Thank goodness we've got a front loader.

Gregg and I celebrated our 8th anniversary on January 11. I really can't believe we've been married that long already. We're finding ourselves in a unique place in our marriage these days, in that we are the most financially stable we have ever been. Gregg has wholeheartedly adopted the Vertical Vision mantra (http://www.myverticalvision.com/), and it has radically changed the way we both view our finances and money in general. We have a good budget in place and have a month's worth of money in the bank before the month even starts. We also have savings and an emergency fund. We used to live paycheck to paycheck and were always afraid of running out of money before the month ended. Also, we stopped using credit cards!! The only debt we have now is a student loan and Gregg's car loan, which we hope to pay off within the next two years. I can't tell you how good it feels to be on our way towards financial freedom.

Anyway, I think that's it for now. I want to start posting more often... blogging has taken a backseat to Facebook, house cleaning, and taking care of a toddler, but I think I should make the effort to squeeze it in more!

'Tis the Season...

... for decorating, shopping, baking and making merry! I'm so excited that Christmas is only a week and a half away. All the gifts have been bought AND wrapped, stashed in our bedroom closet until the 25th. Shopping has been a lot easier (and more fun) since I have my own vehicle- we bought a used minivan on Craiglist about four weeks ago. Gregg hates to shop, especially at the mall, so I volunteered to do most of it. He really didn't have to twist my arm for that one. :) The tree has been up since the Saturday after Thanksgiving. We finally got a fake one this year that came pre-lit, and Colton is mesmerized by all of the lights whenever we plug them in.

This time of year always brings me back to that magical place I found all too easily as a kid. Seeing the lights on the tree, listening to Christmas music almost 24-7, and thinking about the birth of our Savior has definitely put me in a state of awe and wonder. I can't remember the last time I felt this content. So many of the lyrics of familiar carols move me to worship God, who unbelievably loves me enough to have sent His son to earth. Lately I've been meditating on one verse from O Holy Night: "Let all within us praise His holy name".

Mixed in with all of the reflections about the true reason for this season, are also thoughts about having another baby. It is such a spiritual and intimate thing, to decide to conceive a child. You are partnering with your husband and God to create a life. This thought has struck me as very profound recently. I've been asking myself, are we ready for a second kid? Am I ready... to most likely go through a repeat c-section, experience the highs and lows of pregnancy, and juggle two children under the age of three? And the answer to that is, unequivocally, YES.

There is no question when I look at the child I already have. A perfect blend of both me and Gregg, whose antics and budding personality fill our lives with such joy. Last night as Colton and I played together in his room before dinner, I just took all of him in. I marveled at how much he resembles me when I was his age and how, at almost 2 1/2, he's already able to do so many things. He was without a doubt wonderfully and fearfully made in the image of our God. Experiencing this awe and wonder for my son only makes me want to multiply it. Now I know there are other, less desirable, things that will be multiplied as well- dirty diapers, tears, messes, frustration and headaches. But I also know it will all be worth it. To give life to and raise babies to mature adults with a purpose and heart for the Lord... this is a very high calling. But I'm feeling up to the challenge. :)

Are You Sitting Down For This?

I know. I'm lame. It's been ten months, and I'm finally getting around to posting a real update- not just a once-a-month, play-by-play description of the goings on in the life of Colton.

So, be prepared! I'm going to try to condense the last 10 months into just a few paragraphs. It'll be organized into categories, with only the highlights, I promise.

Job/Finances: Gregg's company was bought out last week by Anheuser Busch, which is now technically InBev. For five months, we sat on pins and needles waiting for the closing to happen, wondering what it would mean for my husband's job. We thought about every possible scenario: a transfer (and another move), unemployment, a pay cut. All the things I feared the most and prayed fervently would not happen. Well, it turned out that God answered all of my prayers and THEN SOME. After all the dust had settled, Gregg was promoted and given a pay raise. And that's not all. He was promised a significant sum of money while negotiations were going on, to keep confidential about everything as long as he performed his job duties through the closing of the sale. He received this money, as well as a severance package, along with all the sick days/vacation days/personal days he didn't take, and his regular quarterly bonus. The total is in the tens of thousands of dollars.

SO- we've decided to finally buy a second car, pay off one of my student loans, and put the rest in savings. I can't even fully express what a relief and blessing this is to us. Living on one salary with only one car for the last two years has been really, really difficult. I would never go back though and make the decision not to stay at home with our son. All the sacrifices have been worth it. God is SO good!!! I'm very excited to go look at cars this weekend!!

Child(ren): Colton is doing great! He turned two in August and was 25 lbs. 10 oz. & 33 3/4" at his 2-year well visit (20th percentile). He has a vocabulary of 60 words now, and is recognizing more all the time. He loves to "read" books, play with his trucks, pretend that he's cooking at his play kitchen, and just be silly. I think I fall in love with this kid more every day. I look at him and think, "I can't believe he's actually mine". We've talked about trying for Baby #2 after the new year starts.

Church: We have been attending the same church for over a year now and feel like it is exactly the place where God wants us. Gregg became a deacon in the spring, and has recently taken on more responsibility after we lost both of our elders and another deacon due to some very serious personal issues. He's been getting together regularly with the pastor to make administrative decisions the past several weeks. I've been trying to meet with our pastor's wife on a regular basis too, not just because I'm a leader's wife, but because she is an incredible godly woman. She is so transparent and authentic, and genuinely loves the people she serves. She has spoken a lot of truth into my life these past few months.

"SAHMness": There is still nothing I would rather do right now than stay at home. I truly feel that is where God has called me. It doesn't mean that there aren't days when I want to pull my hair out or long for a minute to myself just to go to the bathroom. But I always end up at the end of every day being thankful that I can be here for Colton while he's this young. I am still actively involved in my local MOMS Club, which is such a godsend. In June, I took over the task of putting together the newsletter each month and that's been really fun. I am so grateful to have found this wonderful group of mommies, who have become some good friends. They have made the last 14 months bearable. Before I joined last September, I was on the verge of a breakdown. I literally never left the house and was struggling to take care of an infant on my own while my husband was away from home for 12 hours a day. Finding them was a real turning point for me. While most of the women are unchurched, they have been an incredible blessing to me all the same. Again, God is good!

So I think that sums up everything I want to say. I can't promise I'll be updating my blog on a regular basis from now on, but I'll certainly try. I've become much more of a Facebooker, just typing a quick blurb about what's going on. I did give my blog a pretty new background, so that should be an incentive. :) I do keep up with all of your blogs on a consistent basis, but I've been terrible at leaving comments. So I guess I'm just a lurker now. Well if you've made it this far, congratulations and thank you!

2 Years Old!

My little man turns two today. I have witnessed so many changes take place over the last 365 days. My chubby, easy-going infant turned into a rambunctious toddler. His communication went from mainly crying/whining to actual words and simple sentences. Crawling turned into walking. Then running. Then climbing.

Three weeks after Colton's 1st birthday, his very first tooth appeared. And then another, and another until he had a total of 16. Only his second year molars have yet to pop through the gums. When he was 14 months old, he got his first hair cut. I thought I would cry when his daddy cut off all his blonde curls, but I got over it. At 15 months, he went from two naps a day down to one. A month later, he began taking steps on his own very cautiously. Finally when it seemed like this child would never walk, he did! Right here in our living room, a week after turning 17 months old. Language development also seemed to take forever. At 18 months, Colton only had a vocabulary of five words. Then it grew and grew until he was saying a new word every day. Now he can say about 40 words.

I've changed another 2,000 diapers this year. Made about 300 peanut butter sandwiches. Watched more Sesame Street and Barney than any adult should ever watch. Lived through a hellish week of teething (i.e. no sleep) while first year molars came in. Walked probably 1,000 miles "just to get outside", either pushing a stroller or following behind a very curious toddler who was all too eager to look at rocks, twigs, or leaves. Visited nearly every playground within a ten mile radius so said toddler would put pent up energy to good use, ensuring a solid 2-hour nap in the afternoon. Said, pleaded, and even yelled the word "no" too many times to count (a million?). Kissed, hugged, and snuggled at least several thousand times. Loved so much I thought my heart would burst.

This second year of Colton's life has been filled with exciting milestones, tantrums, frustration, joy, and amazement as I've watched my baby become a boy. Every day I fall more in love with him and marvel at the beautiful child God has blessed me with. He melts my heart with his kisses and fills my life with his fun-loving spirit. I am so honored to be his mother. Happy Birthday, Coltie!!

23 Months

This is the last time I will be posting Colton's updates in terms of "months", because in the next thirty days he will turn two and then I will simply say that he's two years old. As I'll do whenever anybody asks me how old he is. The exact month, and when he was fresh out of the womb, weeks, have always been vitally important to me when speaking about my son. They have been my benchmarks to measure his developmental progress against. Now the pediatrician won't even require seeing him for another whole half of a year. I suspect I will learn to use "halfs" with as much endearment during the next several years of Colton's life.

So as we count down to the big "2", here are some of the things my little monkey has learned and experienced this past month. He's up to 18 words now!! If I tried to put them all together in a sentence, it wouldn't make much sense but at least his vocabulary is growing. Last night at dinnertime, Gregg asked him to say "more please" before another helping of spaghetti, and I did a double take when Colton actually said it! He can now identify five different body parts, and we're working on some more.

Colton now has almost all of his teeth, except for the second year molars. The upper right cuspid came in this past month, and the lower ones just made their way through the gums as well. And my "baby" has given up his binky. For good. After he lost one and chewed holes through two others, we just decided to stop giving it to him one night three weeks ago. The first few nights were a little rough, but overall he's been completely fine without it. It seems I underestimated my kid!

He enjoys being my little helper, and I use that term very loosely. He'll hand me stuff out of the top rack in the dishwasher to put away, often faster than I can get them dried. When I move laundry around, Colton will place the wet clothes one at a time into the dryer and then close the door, sometimes before they're all loaded! He also puts his dirty clothes in the hamper, and once in a while he's put his socks (which he likes to take off after his nap) into the washing machine. It is so cute to find one little pair of socks in there when I go to start the laundry in the morning.

Because it's been so stinkin' hot, he's had lots of opportunities to play in the water and he LOVES it! Whether it's running through the sprinkler, playing at a water table, or splashing & kicking in the pool, Colton can't get enough. It is so much fun to see him enjoy the water in that pure, unadulterated way.

I'm excited (and a little terrified) to have my little boy turn 2. As his second birthday approaches, I'll be taking a look back at this past year and all the milestones he achieved. Can't wait to see what his third year brings!

22 Months

Crazy how time flies. I didn't even realize it was the 14th until sometime this morning! Colton has had another busy month learning through play, making discoveries, and having fun outdoors. He LOVES to go outside and take walks, exploring nature all around him. He'll pick up rocks, sticks, pine cones, point out flowers and squirrels (which he calls "dogs"), and say hi to cars passing by. He also enjoys looking at the small brook we have by the clubhouse in our condo development and throwing sticks & rocks in it. Colton really likes trucks, too. He gets very excited when he sees one zoom by, everything from the mail truck to the ice cream truck. I don't think he realizes yet that the ice cream truck actually has cold, delicious treats on it. He just seems to like the fact that it plays (awful sounding) music. :)

This past month, he appears to have gained an ever greater understanding of what we say (oh boy). He observes everything we do and copies it. Whenever it's time to pray before dinner, Colton will stop what he's doing and fold his hands right along with us until Gregg finishes praying. He sorta grasps the concept of using a napkin, too. He knows that you need a napkin to wipe your face- only he holds it in his fist and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand! He knows what taking a bath means and starts gesturing towards the baby bathtub when we say "it's time for your bath". Colton also understands what it means to put something back or go back to the place that we were before. He can now pick out our car out of all the other ones parked in our lot and reaches for the door handle to get in.

Colton began saying the word "this" about four weeks ago, and uses it all the time to ask for what he wants. I keep having to play the guessing game to figure out which "this" he means. I'll hold up an object and he'll either shake his head no or mumble what sounds like "yeah". Then I make sure I say something like "oh, you want the cup." Colton also just said "car" for the first time this morning, and it sounded like he said his cousin's name (Kate) yesterday when we were at my in-laws'. The only sentence he says right now is "Hi dog".

He's taking bigger risks with climbing, which freaks me out. Colton climbs from the couch to the tv cabinet, then stands on top of it to reach the window blinds, because he likes to open and close them. Another thing of his is climbing on top of the nightstand drawer and jumping off of it onto our bed! He is seriously a little monkey.

I've started thinking about plans for his 2nd birthday already. We'll probably do a Sesame Street or Elmo theme. I can't believe that he'll be 2 in only two more months!!

21 Months

I can't believe another month has gone by, and as with any other month, I've seen plenty of advancements in my little boy's development, however subtle they might be to other people! One of the advantages of staying home with him is that I am able to witness every part of his growth as it happens. And it is so exciting and rewarding.

Colton's gross motor skills have continued to improve in the form of running and climbing. He has started opening our clothes drawers and using them as steps to climb up onto the dressers. He will use anything he can lately as a stepping stool in order to climb on the bookshelf, deck railings, even his crib. While I applaud his resourcefulness and sense of exploration, it also drives me nuts and makes me a little afraid that he's going to get seriously hurt. Besides climbing, Colton loves to run (away from us) and he looks hilarious doing it. He runs with his left arm swinging at his side and not gracefully, often tripping over his own feet. One of his favorite things to do now is also riding his Little Tikes ride-on toy up and down the hallway. He'll ride it out onto the deck every chance he gets.

I've noticed that Colton's receptive language has grown tremendously during the past month, where it seems like he really does understand everything we say. He is starting to comprehend simple consequences, too. The other night while sitting in the highchair, he was dangling his fork over the floor and Gregg told him that if he dropped it, he would not be allowed to have any more french fries. Colton thought for a moment, then put the fork back on the highchair tray. He has also added the words "okay" and "cheese" to his vocabulary and the phrase "no way". He's begun using "no" as a way to communicate that he doesn't want or like something. Before he went around saying it with no real purpose, and only when he encountered an object or room he knew he wasn't allowed to touch/play in. Gregg pointed out recently that Colton is imitating a lot of the words and simple sentences we use on a regular basis, though they aren't very clear yet.

Another exciting development is Colton beginning to engage us in play. Before he would mostly just play by himself, even doing some imaginary play. But now he'll hand us an object he wants us to use in his little play scenarios, along with running and hiding with the hopes that we'll go find him. He's not a very good hider yet though. He always starts giggling whenever we get close to his "hiding spots"! The nursery workers at church also tell me that Colton has started actually playing with the other children at various points during nursery hour. Last weekend, we decided it was time to get him his first box of crayons. As he scribbles with them on a piece of paper, I make a point of telling him which color he is using. I also have to remind him that crayons are not a snack.

I'm finding his behavior a little easier to manage these days, now that he's found some new ways of communicating his needs. That, and I have been praying for wisdom as a mom. I'm realizing that God fills in the cracks and gives me exactly what I need while I stay home to take care of my son. Hopefully I'll find some time to blog more often, something more than just the monthly Colton update... :)

20 Months

Only four more months until my little man turns 2! Although, I think the "terrible twos" have already started. Colton deliberately does things he knows he is not supposed to do, and sometimes it seems like he isn't listening to me at all. I think part of it is he wants to test my authority, and another is he has so much energy that it has to go somewhere. From the minute he wakes up to the time he goes to bed, he is going non-stop (with the exception of his afternoon nap). He loves to climb and explore right now, so he has a hard time with anything that limits this freedom. He's also asserting his independence more and more these days, while still wanting to be close to Mommy.

We had a really rough time a few weeks ago getting Colton to go to bed at night. It was especially frustrating because we've never had sleep issues with him, and all of a sudden he resisted going to sleep in his crib. I'd get him ready for bed, and as it got closer to bedtime he would become increasingly agitated and even anxious or fearful. He would scream as soon as I placed him in the crib and after I'd say goodnight and turn to leave, inevitably he'd throw up. So I'd have to get him out, change him, change the sheets, take the bumper off, and Gregg would wet vac the carpet. This went on for six nights in a row. Sometimes after an episode we'd just put him to sleep in the pack 'n play that's in our room, and I'd wake up every time he coughed or stirred. Other nights I'd put him back in the crib, and he would cry & scream for several minutes before crashing only to wake up at 3 or 4am crying for me and wouldn't go back down again easily.

Gregg and I began arguing with each other over what to do, and in the meantime nobody was getting any sleep. The situation really forced us to work together to find a solution and, more importantly, pray about it. Finally I suggested Gregg start putting Colton to bed because his anxiety seemed to be related to not wanting to be apart from me. The first few nights were still rough, but there were no incidents of puking and there haven't been any since. Honestly, the whole thing made me really question whether I actually want to have another kid. I know this was a phase, and it seems to be behind us now, but I still don't know if I can go through something like this again.

There are plenty of times where I see glimpses of the Colton I knew as a baby: sweet, easygoing, lovable. Sometimes it's hard to remember that he's still the same kid when it appears that he's been replaced with a tempermental, energetic toddler who makes it really hard to get anything done around here because I constantly have to stop what I'm doing to discipline him. At least it started getting warmer this past month, so I could go for walks with him and take him to the park. Even being able to open our sliders off of the deck so Colton can play on it has been a huge plus. He has practiced his climbing skills at the playground, discovered leaves, rocks and twigs in the park, and played to his heart's content out on the deck while waving and saying "hi" to everyone who passes by. He has shown that he is willing to let go of me in order to have some adventures on his own, knowing that I'm never too far away and will be right there to comfort him if he falls down and cries. We're both walking that delicate balance of independence and reliance on Mommy.

Colton still only says about four words with any consistency, but it seems like he is finidng new ways of communicating his needs and wants to us. I am trying to encourage him to talk by not just giving him what he wants when he whines or points, although I know exactly what it is. I wait for him to at least say something, even if it's gibberish, and then I'll say what the actual word is back to him. There is so much that he understands now, like when I ask if he would like some milk, he'll go directly to the fridge and pull on the door handle. If I tell him we're taking the dog for a walk, he'll open the hall closet and reach for the leash that's hanging up. Then he likes to carry the empty poop bag until I need it. He is becoming pretty helpful in his own way. Colton enjoys pushing the swiffer around and sweeping up the dust bunnies and dog hair on the floor. He hands me pieces of lint or garbage (if we're outside somewhere) and then if I instruct him to throw them away in the trash can, he does. When we're having a playdate with my friend Erin and her two girls, he will give the baby her pacifier or toy.

Some days it seems like the easiest thing in the world to take care of him and others it's amazing I'm able to get a load of laundry done and cook dinner while he whips through the house like a tornado. Sometimes I'm in desperate need of a break because I'm so frustrated and exhausted from dealing with him, and others my heart literally aches because I love him so much and can't bear to spend one minute away. Colton is teaching me a lot about myself every day. It's hard to believe he's more than halfway through his second year already!

19 Months

This past month in my little boy's life has been one of the most challenging so far. It's as if turning a year and a half flipped on a switch somewhere inside him to become quite the handful!

Colton now almost runs and since he still isn't the most coordinated kid, many times he trips over his own feet and lands flat on the floor. He is also climbing on EVERYTHING. A few weeks ago, he figured out how to hoist himself up onto our couches. Colton then goes from the arm of the couch to the television stand and sits on it while turning the tv off and on. Once he's up there, he'll always gesture for his remote (an old one we took the batteries out of). He's also been climbing on our kitchen chairs and is not content just to sit on them- no, he gets up onto the table as well! If we don't strap him in his hook-on chair, he stands up in it and climbs onto the table from there too. It makes me want to pull my hair out!!

During the month Colton cut at least six new teeth (that I can see): both upper and lower molars, and two incisors. Teething never seemed to affect him before, but this time it really took its toll. My poor little guy had a lot of diarrhea, which caused a nasty diaper rash, along with a fever of 101 degrees. The fever only lasted 24 hours, thank goodness. The day Colton had it, he was definitely not himself- crying over the smallest things, whimpering like he was in pain, not eating, not playing with his toys. All he wanted to do was cuddle with me. That night he woke up almost every hour, crying. By the afternoon he was pretty much back to his normal self. It was an awful and scary thing to see him go through though.

Colton's receptive language has really taken off. I'm surprised at all of the things he is able to understand now. He responds to requests and commands almost all the time- unless he's deliberately disobeying us. Sometimes he gets confused, like the other day I asked him to give me the bowl I let him play with and he gave me the ball instead. He's been pretty good about picking stuff up and putting it away when I ask. I've been making him clean up after himself when he makes a mess, such as dumping out his toys all over the floor or throwing handfuls of dog food.

Colton is trying to imitate some new words too, like "juice" and "spray" (for the handheld water spray we use during his bath). He's been saying "hi" a lot lately. For a while, his favorite word was "no". Last week it was nice outside so I took him for a walk in his stroller, and he said hi to everyone we passed by. He also says it when we arrive at somebody's house and when he hears the Skype dial tone, since we do video chat with Gregg's mom. When we're getting ready to go out somewhere, Colton will go to the hall closet and start reaching for the coats. One night before Gregg came home, I asked him where Daddy was and he went towards the front door and said, "go?" He also found an old set of keys somewhere one day and immediately went to the door to "try them out". He doesn't say much (at least that's intelligible), but he sure picks up on everything!

His temper is getting worse, as to be expected. He's started throwing and occasionally hitting when he doesn't get his way. I try to communicate that this isn't acceptable behavior, either by giving him a one- minute time out, or putting right him down if I've been holding him and then walking away. I say "no" a lot also, but I don't think it's nearly as effective. I'm trying really, really hard not to lose my temper when he gets out of control, but it isn't easy. I know he doesn't have the communication skills to express his frustration yet, and I want to teach him how to deal with it appropriately. On the flip side of the tantrums, Colton gives me and Gregg kisses, even without being prompted. Generally, he is still such a sweet little boy and I am so pleased to be his momma. :)

Spring Come Quickly

I have never been more ready for spring to arrive. We just got another three feet of snow last Thursday and Friday, on top of the snow from earlier in the month that hadn't melted yet. Today was 41 degrees and it felt like a heatwave! Only three weeks until spring officially starts...

So other than snow, snow, and more snow things have been going well around here. My mother-in-law is generously letting me use her car while she's down in North Carolina watching Gregg's sister's kids for the next six weeks. Lori and Adam are currently in China for stem cell treatments on Adam to improve his vision. He is legally blind, diagnosed with Optic Nerve Atrophy as a kid, and has never driven a car or seen his kids' faces clearly. They had to raise about $40,000 to go over there and they were able to do it in less than 9 months! So while she's in NC, my MIL is driving Lori's SUV and offered to let me have her car which I am really grateful for. :) I've been going to MOMS Club activities, visiting with a friend from church, and shopping with Colton a few times. That is, when it hasn't snowed!

On February 15, Colton had his 18 month well visit and was 24 lbs. 6 oz. and 31 1/2". He's in the 25th percentile for both height and weight now. My chunky little baby isn't so chunky anymore! Everything else looked great at the appointment and he received three more shots, during which he screamed his head off. Colton has been cutting his molars and lower lateral incisors for the past couple of weeks too. Last week he had a lot of really nasty diapers, and pooped five times in one day. His poor little bottom was so rashy, and I felt horrible for him. It seems to have cleared up now, though. I think the diarrhea was caused by the teething, but I'm not 100% sure. Gregg seems to think it's a reaction to a new bottle of vitamin drops that might just be bad. I was also giving Colton blueberry yogurt and oatmeal for breakfast, along with assorted fruit (strawberries, pineapple, etc.) throughout the day when the problem started, so it could be a reaction to the food. We started eliminating one thing at a time to try and figure out the source, but don't have any definite answers yet.

That's pretty much it for now. Taking care of a house (okay, condo) and a child is all-consuming. I'm being challenged daily by my toddler whose frustration tolerance is about zero. It seems no matter what I do during the day, it is guaranteed that he will have a tantrum over something a half hour to an hour before dinner. I am always so frazzled by the time we sit down to eat. I can't wait for warmer weather so I'll be able to take a walk with Colton in the afternoon. A lot of days I just don't know what to do to occupy his time between when he wakes up from his nap and Gregg comes home. Motherhood is so much fun! (insert sarcasm)

18 Months!!!

I can't believe my "baby" is 18 months old! Or a year and a half. Or halfway through his second year of life. However you want to say it, he is growing up!!

The past month brought some exciting developments, the biggest of all being Colton finally walking on his own. At first he sort of seemed to stumble around like he was drunk, but eventually he gained more balance. He no longer crawls anymore and instead walks quite confidently (and quickly) to wherever he wants to go now. I am so excited that he has at long last reached this milestone.

I'm definitely seeing more of his personality showing through, as well as that temper! Colton wants to do a lot of things on his own, and is very proud when he's able to do so. Like turn off his own light, feed himself a container of yogurt, or reach up to the counters or table to get something he wants. With more independence comes a power struggle between him and I for everything from getting dressed to cleaning his hands and face after each meal. He will not lay still on the changing table anymore, so I've resorted to changing him on the floor. He's even given me a hard time about his nap lately. I used to rock him a little, pop a binky in his mouth, and he'd be out cold in two minutes. But lately, not so much.

When we tell Colton "no", he will repeat it back to us several times. Not in a talking back kind of way though. This is his way of showing us that he understands what is off limits. Sometimes he'll do something or go to an area of the house he's not supposed to (like the bathroom) and then stop himself and say "no no". I've discovered that while he can be pretty cantankerous with the two of us at times, he is passive with other children around his age. If, for instance, another toddler takes a toy from him, he just lets them take it. This doesn't seem to phase him. He might stare at the kid for a few seconds, but he always goes and finds something else to play with right afterwards.

Something new he's been doing also is finding a secluded part of the house when he has to poop. The past few days, I've found him hanging out by the side of the refrigerator making the poopy face. Gregg says this is a good sign that Colton is starting to recognize when he has to "go". Just one step closer to potty training. Yay.

Of course, he can't actually tell us he has to go bathroom yet. He's still only saying about six words. But he does understand a lot of simple commands, like "bring me the ball" or "come here". And the other day I said "who wants a snack?" and Colton immediately popped his binky out and handed it to me. He also raises his arms up when he wants to be held or get out of his hook-on chair. He will pass his plate to one of us at dinnertime when he wants food, too. I've been working on pointing out different parts of Coltie's body to him, and he knows where his nose is almost 100% of the time.

I am so pleased with the little boy he's becoming, always learning and revealing something new about himself every day. We go for his 18 month well visit tomorrow night, and I'm anxious to see how much he's grown! It's hard to believe he'll be celebrating his second birthday this August.